See, I really couldn't sing 
I could never really sing 
What I couldn't do was, sing!
I have trouble with the,
Note!

It goes all around my,
Throat!
It's a terrifying,
Thing!

See, I really couldn't hear 
Which note was lower or was,
Higher!
Which is why I disappear 
If someone says, "Let's start a,
Choir!"

Hey, when I begin to,
Shriek!
It's a across between I,
Squeak!
And a quiver or I,
Moan!
It's a little like a,
Croak!
Or the record player,
Broke!
What it doesn't have is,
Tone!

Oh, I know you're thinking what a crazy,
Ding-a-ling
But I really couldn't,
Sing!
I could never really,
Sing!
What I couldn't do was,
Sing!,
Three blind mice 
Three blind mice 
It isn't intentional!,
She's doing her best,
Jingle bells, jingle bells 
Jingle bells, 
Jingle bells It really blows my mind,
She gets depressed
But what I lack in pitch I sure make up in,
Power

And all my friends 
Say I am perfect for the shower
Still, I'm terrific at a,
Dance!
Guys are comin' in their,
Pants!
I'm a birdie on the,
Wing!
But when I begin to,
Chirp!
They say, "Who's the little",
Twerp!
Goin' 'pong' instead of, '
Ping'!"

And when Christmas comes 
And all my friends go caroling
It is so dishearten, ning!
It is so disquiet,
Ting!
It is so discourag, ging!
Darling, please stop answer,
Ring!
See, I really couldn't,
Sing!
I could never really,
Sing!
Wha'

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